BORDER CZAR WITH A CASHBACK PROGRAM

“No credible evidence”

“Fifty thousand dollars may not buy credibility, but it will apparently buy you a clean bill of health from the DOJ.”

Tom Homan, the administration’s self-declared “border czar,” has found himself in the middle of a plotline that sounds less like policy and more like an episode of Better Call Saul. According to reports, Homan happily accepted $50,000 in cash from undercover FBI agents posing as businessmen. In most circles, this is called a bribe. In Trumpworld, it is apparently called “consulting.”

The Justice Department, once famous for investigating crimes, has since announced there was “no credible evidence” of wrongdoing. Which is convenient, since the cash literally left credible evidence in the form of serial numbers. But no matter, when the boss says the case is closed, the case is closed. Evidence is now just another “deep state conspiracy,” like climate change, evolution, or the idea that children deserve clean drinking water.

The White House has leapt to Homan’s defense with the energy of a toddler caught red-handed in the cookie jar, swearing he “never took the money.” Of course, they forgot to tell Homan himself, who has yet to deny the exchange outright. Perhaps he is busy laundering it into singles for the MAGA campaign rallies.

Meanwhile, Democrats are demanding the release of recordings and documents from the sting operation. The odds of that happening are roughly equal to Trump releasing his tax returns.

Let’s be clear: the scandal is not that a Trump official allegedly accepted a suitcase of cash. That’s practically a job requirement at this point. The scandal is that we are expected to keep pretending it’s normal. America’s government has become a pawn shop where loyalty is the only currency and everyone swears the merchandise isn’t stolen.

Fifty thousand dollars may not buy credibility, but it will apparently buy you a clean bill of health from the DOJ. The republic deserves better. At a minimum, it deserves a cashier’s receipt.

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